Overcoming Anger

The story is told that in the latter 1800’s, Alfred Lord Tennyson invited a Russian nobleman to his estate. And early one morning this nobleman took off with dogs and guns and servants to go hunting.

At mid-day he returned and Lord Tennyson asked him how he did. He answered, "Not very well. I shot two peasants." Lord Tennyson thought for a moment and then said, “No, we pronounce it with a ‘ph’ here. It is ‘pheasants.’ You shot two pheasants."

"No," the nobleman replied, "I shot two peasants. They were insolent (in other words, got “smart” with him”) towards me, so I shot them."

Now we smile in disbelief at a story like that. But, how many of you have heard a true story of a “road rage” shooting? Most of have!
Now, of course, we wouldn’t do anything like that. But have you ever lost your temper? Do you ever do things you wish you hadn’t done, or say things you wish you had never said?

Well, the Bible has something to say about overcoming anger. Proverbs 19:11 says, "A person’s wisdom yields patience; it is to one’s glory to overlook an offense."

Now there is the secret, isn’t it? If someone offends you and if you are a person of wisdom (God’s wisdom) then you can overlook it, and not allow the situation to become a major event that overwhelms you.

If you study anger in the Bible you will find that there are 4 types of anger dealt with in the Bible. Sudden anger, sinful anger, stubborn anger and justified anger. Let’s look at each of those 4 types of anger.

I. SUDDEN ANGER IS TO BE CONTROLLED

A. First of all there is sudden anger, and the Bible says that sudden anger is to be controlled.

1. Proverbs 14:17 says, “A quick-tempered person does foolish things”. We already knew that because we’ve experienced that in our own lives. We may blame our quick temper on our red hair. Or we may blame it on our heritage. After all, we’re Irish or something like that. We may even be proud of it. But the bottom line is, if we have a short fuse, we’re going to do a lot of foolish things. When we lose our temper we’ll say things we know we shouldn’t have said, and do things that we’re going to be sorry for later on.

2. Next, Proverbs 15:18 says, "A hot-tempered person stirs up conflict." That simply means that if you have a short fuse, if you’re always losing your temper, if you’re walking around with a chip on your shoulder, if you’re just looking for somebody to say something that will irritate you, then you’re going to leave a trail of hurt feelings and unhappiness behind you.

Will Rogers said, "Whenever you fly into a rage, you seldom make a safe landing." And he is right.

Chuck Swindoll said, "I got so angry that I gave him a piece of my mind. And it was a piece that I couldn’t afford to lose."

3. Proverbs 18:13 says, "Spouting off before listening to the facts is both shameful and foolish.” (NLT). He is talking about jumping to conclusions. We hear just a little bit of what is said, and we instantly jump to a conclusion, and oftentimes it is the wrong conclusion
A hot temper could also mean loss of family and friends. The penalties of losing our temper are many.

B. So the Bible says, "If you have a sudden temper, then you need to control it." But how can we do that?

You may say, "Why, I just can’t control my temper. It gets away from me." But you can. Have you ever found yourself engaged in a heated discussion with your voice getting louder and your words becoming more rapid? Then the telephone rings and you say, "Hello", very calmly. Sure, you can control your temper.

So we need to recognize that we have a problem with temper. As long as we deny it, as long as we blame it on heritage or short-fuse or whatever we choose to blame it on, we’ll never improve.

Then we must confess our problem to God and ask for His help. "Lord, I’m beginning to lose my temper, and I’ve done it many times before. Please help me see what is causing it to happen, and then help me to overcome it."
The Bible teaches that when the Holy Spirit guides our life, that one fruit of the spirit is self control. And if you have a sudden temper, you need to control it.

II. SINFUL ANGER IS TO BE CONDEMNED

The second type of anger discussed in scripture is sinful anger. Not all anger is sinful, and we’ll talk about that later in the lesson. But some anger is. So let’s see what the Bible says about whether your anger is sinful or not.

In Matthew 5:21, Jesus says, “You have heard that it was said to the people long ago, ‘You shall not murder, and anyone who murders will be subject to judgment. But I tell you that anyone who is angry with a brother or sister will be subject to judgment.”

Now that passage tells us some things about anger that should help us realize when our anger is sinful and when it is not. Now if you’re a brother or sister to someone it indicates that you are a member of the same family, whether a domestic family or the family of God.

If we’re brothers and sisters, we ought to be lifting each other up, supporting and helping each other. We should not spend our time being angry at one another. If you’re angry at your brother or sister, this indicates that you are focusing your anger on a person and means that your anger is sinful. We should never focus our anger on people, but rather on the sins they commit. Jesus was never angry at people, but He was angry at their sins. So look beyond the person. We must love the person, but hate their sin.

Now in Romans 12:19 Paul says, "Do not take revenge, my dear friends, but leave room for God’s wrath, for it is written: “It is mine to avenge; I will repay,” says the Lord.”

Another test of our anger is this: Is it anger that seeks revenge? Are we always trying to get even? The Bible teaches that God is the one who has the right of vengeance. Not us. We don’t have the right to repay anyone. But rather, turn that over to God. So if our anger is geared towards seeking revenge, then it is very definitely sinful anger.

If it is vengeful, then most likely it is also an anger that is cherished. There are a lot of people who love being angry. They’ve been angry for years. Inside of them there is a boiling mass of anger. So if anger is cherished, it most certainly is sinful anger.

If it is a cherished anger it will also be anger with an unforgiving spirit. And the secret to getting rid of anger is to be able to forgive. But if you can’t forgive, if you can’t release it, then it is a sinful anger.

If it is sinful, then we need to repent, to turn away from it, and allow God to forgive us of it so that we can become forgiving people, too.

III. STUBBORN ANGER IS TO BE CONQUERED

Stubborn anger is that which just stays there, day after day after day. One of the classic passages that deals with anger begins in Ephesians 4:26. “In your anger do not sin. Do not let the sun go down while you are still angry." And the next verse says, "And do not give the devil a foothold."

One you’re angry or upset about something. You’re carrying a chip on your shoulder, just waiting for someone to knock it off. Then your spouse (could well be child, parent, fellow worker or maybe a friend that you run into) says something you don’t particularly appreciate, and soon heated words are being exchanged. It really doesn’t amount to much, but you’re determined to get your way, and the other one is determined to get their way. So the argument continues. And the day ends and the issue is not resolved. You may even begin to think about all the bad things people do and say to you, all the insults, all of the inconsiderate things that go on. And then you blow up! And the things that Paul says we should get rid of in verse 31, happens: bitterness, rage and anger, brawling and slander, and malice.
Do you realize what has happened? The Bible says that you have opened the door, and said, "Mr. Devil, come right on in. We’ll make you welcome here." Then Satan begins to do his dirty work.

Paul goes on to say in verse 32, “Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you.”

JUSTIFIED ANGER MUST BE CHANNELED IN THE RIGHT DIRECTION FOR GOD

“In your anger do not sin." It is okay to be angry, but do not sin.

Mark 3:1-5 is a passage that deals with a situation where Jesus has healed a man on the Sabbath and knew that some the “church folks” were looking for “a reason to accuse Jesus” and healing on the Sabbath was against their “rules”. In verse 5 the Bible say, “He (Jesus) looked around at them in anger”. He is angry because of their stubborn hearts and their stubborn anger.
The Bible says that Jesus was tempted in all points, even as we are tempted, but He never sinned. So this passage teaches that Jesus became angry but it wasn’t sinful anger. It was justified anger, channeled anger, anger that has the right focus, and the right object - sin.

Maybe an infusion of anger is the very thing that the church needs. A holy anger at all the sin in the world. Anger at the fact that many people are dying without Jesus.
There are all kinds of anger. And if you are wrestling with them, God promises to give you victory, if you’ll let Him.

So get let’s get the chip of our shoulders.